And I can't even wrap my mind around it.
I think it's surreal for any parent to watch their child grow up.
I see it with Sierra.
You wonder how your sweet, perfect little baby is becoming their own person.
But it's just so much more complicated with a medically fragile child.
When your history together runs so deep
When you've seen your 7 pound baby be placed on a ventilator
When you've had conversations with doctors about your 2 month old child not making it to his next surgery, and likely not thriving even if he does
When you've spent months in the hospital at your infant's bedside
When you've begged your toddler to keep fighting through one more night, one more surgery, one more hurdle
When you've held your preschooler down for countless procedures and blood draws
When you've cried out to God from surgical waiting rooms, begging him to bring your 7 year son out of another surgery
When you've watched your pre-teen's body struggle to keep up with his friends on the basketball court, his brain struggle in the classroom, and his heart struggle at the sleepover...
You put your walls up.
You don't dare to dream past the current moment.
You don't let yourself expect the walking, and talking, and going to school, and driving a car, and graduating from high school and college, and getting married and starting a family.
It's just too much to hope for all of that.
You protect your heart.
Instead you live day to day, milestone to milestone.
And here's the cool thing.
When you don't let yourself expect the milestones, and then you hit them, it's really freaking cool.
So when Bodie got his braces put on last month
And then turned 13 this month
I was hit with ALL THE FEELS.
I may have been a hot mess.
But in the best possible way.
Because this kid is amazing.
We are so stinking proud of this kid.
For who he is.
For what he's overcome.
For what he still has ahead of him.
Today, Bodie loves animals, gaming with the most incredible group of friends any mom could ever ask for, and playing horror movies.
Probably not in that order.
Because he's 13.
Did I mention that he's 13?
Happy 13th birthday, Bodie.
Here's to many, many, many more!